Dear Mocha Momma,
Mocha, I am one day late for your birthday celebration, and for that? I apologize.
To make it up to you, and because we continue to miss each other when you're near my parts (connotation slightly intentional), I've decided to tell you how we celebrated your birthday last night in The Imaginary Land of Pudding. (It's a beautiful place filled with ponds of Swedish Fish and rivers of non-fat chai. The sky is a clever blend of orange and blue, and I weigh 115 pounds when I'm dripping wet. Everyone kisses each other and no one glances sideways.)
First off? We went to a fancy pants shoe store, where I bought you these, simply because they remind me of you.
(By the way, I brought a flask into the shoe stop. It was full of Purple Passion, because that's how I like to freak it up in The Imaginary Land of Pudding.)
After shoes, we headed to Brandt's for dinner. Upon entering the building, I announced that "I'm the motherf#$*ing Fluid Pudding," so they opened the Bloody Mary Buffet just for us. (I'm a master at the pulling of strings in The Imaginary Land of Pudding. Many people believe I'm the mayor. And I let them believe.)
We got tanked. Happy Birthday.
Then, because I may be the most responsible person this side of the Mississippi, I hailed a cab for us.
It dropped you off at the Ritz-Carlton for a night of pampering, and it drove me around for nearly seven hours as I bellowed out the lyrics to Licensed to Ill and Newsies until sobriety rushed over me.
I hope your birthday was an amazing one. Please know that we continue to celebrate it here in The Imaginary Land of Pudding--where a lick to the face isn't completely unheard of. You definitely fit right in.
Love,
FP
Submitted by
dee
at 4/4/2008 1:26:50 PM- The Imaginary Land of Pudding sounds like my kinda place. Are you currently taking reservations? I'm ready to book my trip.
And, charge it to my imaginary credit card, of course.
Submitted by
Mocha
at 4/4/2008 4:34:46 PM- Dear Pudding Heiress,
I am deeply moved by the lovely April letter celebrating my birth. Moreso, that we partied like it was 1999 in your world.
Bloody Marys all around. Only in Pudding Land.
Dude. I love you.
Watch out for me near your parts soon.
Love,
La Mocha
Submitted by
Meg T.
at 4/5/2008 12:06:02 AM- I wish someone thought of awesome red and white fab patterned wedge shoes when they thought of me...
:)
Dude. I wanna fight for my right to party with YOU. The Land of Pudding sounds magical.