Our tooth fairy brings Swedish Fish and a dollar.

Jeff has been in San Francisco this week, which means I’m currently parenting at a level of eight point five. (I normally hover at around five or six.) Eight point five means I often come down on the girls for not clearing their breakfast dishes, I clean the litter box every other day, and I’m prone to say things like “White Castle? Well, OKAY then!”

These Are The Things Jeff Missed This Week:

I melted down at the beginning of the week with that whole Mistake I Made and the aftershock stupidity waves and inadequacy quakes. (Jeff is not sorry that he missed this event.)

Harper took an important test and did really well, and she’s SUPER proud of herself. (We celebrated with White Castle, because I tend to reward achievement with POISON!)

Meredith performed in a reader’s theater production, and it was amazing to see how Capable and Talented seven and eight year olds can be. Afterward, she tried egg drop soup for the first time and loved it! (I have stuffed myself with crab rangoon twice in the past week. Jennifer Hudson is NOT happy with me right now.)

I received the most awesome early birthday present ever from my friend Lisa M. Look at what I’m wearing on my finger.

Shy Siren Ring!

It’s a Shy Siren ring and it’s my favorite color, and it looks like a pumpkin, and although I’m not one who squeals, I actually squealed when I opened the box. Thanks again, Lisa. I do believe this is the happiest piece of jewelry I’ve ever worn.

Harper’s been walking around with a knee-buckling loose tooth for the past several days. Unlike Meredith, who was always able to simply reach into her mouth and yank out her teeth, Harper, like me, would much rather someone remove the tooth for her as she sleeps. I gave it a try a few nights back, but honestly? My shuddering and dancing and vomiting prevented me from getting a good grip. When she told me that the school nurse occasionally pulls teeth, I joked around that she may not return to my home until she visits Nurse Carol. Let me just say this: Thank God for Teachers. Yesterday afternoon, Harper’s kindergarten teacher sent her down to the nurse’s office, where the nurse reached in, removed the tooth, and placed it in a tiny treasure box, thereby eliminating my perceived need for Xanax and/or Select 55. When I asked Harper if I could take a photo of her to commemorate the loss of her first tooth, she opted for a video so she could reenact The Moment and the happiness that followed.

Jeff will be back in approximately six hours. I have chosen to celebrate his return with falafel.
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16 thoughts on “Our tooth fairy brings Swedish Fish and a dollar.”

  1. I adore how all of the pics you take of yourself are in front of your refrigerator! (We have the same problem in the JessicaD family) Also adore that ring (and the fact that your husband will be home soon; I despise those long bsns trips)!

  2. Forgive me for gushing… I just love you, AR-D! You make me laugh, shake my head in agreement (especially the “perceived” part of the need sentence) and know I’m not alone. Rock on, my friend, rock on!

  3. I think we might use the same tooth fairy, once our small people start losing teeth. They love swedish fish!

    I’m two days away from starting an 8.5 week. (Yes! He’s leaving on Mother’s Day! Second year in a row!) I am not looking forward to it.

  4. LOVE the re-enactment! (with added giggling from the peanut gallery.)

    My beloved was away last week, and although we missed him terribly, things are a bit more RELAXED with him gone. Dinners get a bit odd, and the big kids have to help out more, but to compensate we let the clutter accumulate a bit and take a more devil-may-care approach to Junk Mail Management.

    We celebrated his return with fettucini.

  5. No Way!!! Our Nurse is named Nurse Carol, and this week I sent my daughter to her for sliver removal – because she’s a paid professional, that’s why!! My son’s first grade teacher will actually pull the tooth herself if she gets a chance – we go to a full-service school – haha.
    I think you have captured exactly the emotions and actions I would associate with having to pull a child’s tooth. I leave that to the above-mentioned professionals and/or my husband.

    Love the ring – wish I were bold enough to wear bold rings -but I have never quite gained that skill (scarf wearing, however, I have got DOWN).

    I always had a hard time when my hubby traveled – never a fan of things that highlight my (perceived) glaring inadequacy.

  6. Omigosh – just watched the video. Fantastic! That is so great – I love how she knew just how to smile to best show the little tooth gap. Performing arts may be in her future!

  7. The ring looks fantastic on you. Love it.

    The reenactment is so sweet it could make my teeth fall out. Her smile is adorable.

    Carry on!

  8. I think you might be flashing a gang sign while showing us your amazing HAPPY ring!

    I cringed and had to take a deep breath when you started talking about the tooth… hoo hooo hoo… still need to pant some… I’ve already informed my darling husband that he will be responsible for all loose teeth for future children. Oh my… I need to lie down. Thank goodness for Nurse Carol!~

  9. So I am sitting here reading your post with interest but not with joy. The reason? I have a headache and I have to work tomorrow and I am feeling pissy about it. I shall wear a puss on my face and everyone shall share my misery…. until the very end of that video. That little face and sweet smile. Shoot – she melted all of my evil. NOW how will I bring everyone down with me? Thanks for that. I guess I will just have to suffer a good mood for a while. :-)

  10. Ohhh… I’d forgotten about those little treasure chests for lost teeth!!! I think I got one from my dentist one time, for a tooth he had to pull. I loved it, for some reason. So teeny! So cute!

    Otto lost his 2nd tooth Friday night in a mysterious manner that involved a big frosted sugar cookie. The tooth was there before the cookie. And then it wasn’t! Magic! We did not make a big deal of it disappearing while eating — we’re just going to write a note to the tooth fairy and call it good.

    Happy mom’s day. :^) H

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