I went to one of those UPS grocery store mailing spots a few days back, and although working at a UPS grocery store mailing spot *might* really suck, I think the business hours plus the proximity to corn bread could potentially turn that suck into dreamy.
Two people were in line ahead of me, and both of them (not surprisingly) were mailing packages.
UPS Guy: Can you give me a brief description of what’s in the box?
Guy in a Misfits shirt: A present.
UPS Guy: Okay, can you be more specific?
Guy in a Misfits shirt: It’s a gift I’m sending to my friend.
Me (to myself): This is fantastic.
When Misfits Guy was squared away, it was Orange Shirt Grandma’s turn.
UPS Guy: Can you give me a brief description of what’s in the box?
The OSG: Just junk.
Me (to myself): YES!
UPS Guy: Okay, can you be more specific?
The OSG: It’s just a box of funny stuff to make her laugh.
It’s just a box of funny stuff to make her laugh. And the UPS guy let it pass without knowing if “she” thinks fragile, liquid, perishable, or potentially hazardous things, including lithium batteries and perfume are hilarious!
And then it was my turn.
UPS Guy: Can you give me a brief description of what’s in the box?
Me: Shoes.
Clearly, I have some work to do.
I’m going to guess that the UPS guy liked your answer the best. ?
Ha ha. . The last time an UPS guy asked me what in the package I was posting, it gave me great pleasure to whisper “knickers”. A vastly underused word in my opinion.
UPS store:
UPS guy: “This box is very light. Can you tell me what’s in it?”
Me: “Dog hair…….”
(Back story: I met a woman at a Fibre Fest who spins the hair of animals other than sheep. I mentioned this to friends who have a beloved ChowChow, and they were intrigued. Accordingly, they saved his hair, I shipped it to the spinner, and it came back as yarn which turned into fingerless mitts. The end.)
I love it! I wonder if she mixes the hair with other fibers. I think it would be SO hard to spin dog hair. So amazing!
The yarn was all dog hair. The spinner requested brushings only from the dog, not clippings, as clippings would be too short and bristly. This Chow is very pampered – he goes for a wash and brush up every week. The clean brushings were saved over the course of a winter. I did add a strand of sock yarn when I knit the mitts to add strength. The mitts are extremely warm – and smell a bit “doggy” when they get damp!