This is what I know: You can take an ear of corn (including the husk and silk and all other corn-related anatomy) and cook it in the microwave on high for three and a half minutes. Take it out (carefully, because it’s really crazy hot), remove outer corn-related things, and what you have left is a perfect corn on the cob. (I’ve been boiling pots of water for years. Wait. I’ve been boiling pots of water for EARS! HA HA HA HA HA!!! Now I can make single servings! Suddenly, everything’s coming up roses.)
This is what I think: Harper’s kindergarten teacher signs all of her correspondence with Love, MFB. When you’re expecting a Sincerely and you get a Love? It’s sort of a pleasant surprise.
This is what I’m wearing: Last week I found myself at Old Navy for the first time in several years. I’ve grown tired of wearing t-shirts with skirts every single day, so I decided to buy A Shirt. I ended up with this one (the red flowered version). I also bought a pair of denim capris, because they were super cheap. This morning I put the jeans on and noticed that the inside of the waistband holds the words The Flirt. I will be extra careful while wearing these jeans, because I cringe at the thought of waking up in an emergency room to a bunch of medical professionals yelling, “Ah! It seems that The Flirt is opening her eyes! Ask The Flirt how many fingers I’m holding up! The Flirt’s O2 Sat is looking a bit coquettish!”
This is what could change my life: On Wednesday, I’ll be kicking off my 40-day Inner Mean Girl Cleanse. When my 40 days are up, I might be putting flowers in my hair and using the L word a lot more. Or maybe not. Perhaps my Inner Mean Girl (I believe her name is Sam. I used to drink beer and introduce myself as Sam. Thank God those days are over. Wait a second. The Flirt! My Inner Flirt is a boozehound!) will fight the cleanse and October will find me looking a bit like this. Either way, things could get interesting. Or maybe not!
This is what I’m eating: Sushi for lunch and Indian for dinner, Lee Greenwood.
I want to give you $150! Come over here, read about my disaster cake decorating experience, tell me a funny story, and you could win $150!