If it fails, I’ll name the baby Adiana.

Do you remember last year when I was talking about having coils jammed into my fallopian tubes? After doing a bit of research and singing some songs about maybe having a third baby somewhere in there, I decided to go with a more temporary solution: Mirena. Many of you have had good experiences with your Mirena, but a few of you have HORROR stories!

Here’s the scoop. That thing that I thought was a third baby somewhere in there ended up being a puppy named Scout. I’m good. (Mostly.)

This morning I had my annual paper-gowned appointment, and as I was poked and scraped, my doctor and I talked about American Girl stores and Adiana Permanent Contraception. According to the brochure (Adiana. Not American Girl.), it’s “Safe. Simple. Forever. Adiana.” If you have any experience with it, I would love to hear your words. I’m scheduled to have it done on August 19th at 7:30 in the morning. August 19th is Bill Clinton’s birthday. (It’s also Tipper Gore’s birthday! I didn’t know those two shared a birthday! Also, John Stamos! And Missy Higgins!!!)

Speaking of loving to hear your words, I want to thank each and every one of you who spoke up last week when I was moaning about my clutter. It feels good to know that we are not alone, doesn’t it? As I sit here at the computer eating a 1.13kg container of mixed nuts, I’m pleased to report that my kitchen sink is empty and my piano bench is no longer being weighed down by correspondence from the elementary school. (I actually practiced the piano in the dark yesterday afternoon. Our power went off in the morning, came back in the afternoon, went off again in the evening, and came back to stay at around 9:00. The dog was very uncomfortable with the off and on, and by “the dog” I mean “me”.) ((I’m still convinced that the second power loss came about because of the hateful thoughts I was having about my neighbor. I won’t get into that right now, because I need my air conditioner to keep working.))

As Jeff cleaned off one of our desks yesterday afternoon, he found a few of my 1996 sketch pads. (1996 was the year I spent dressing in short skirts and opaque tights and using a messenger bag as a purse. In that messenger bag was a sketch pad, a book of Mark Strand poetry, and lots of Rolaids to combat the obscene amount of coffee I was drinking.) I was never an artist, but I loved to pretend—as long as no one was around to watch me pretend. If a coffee dump was crowded, the sketch pad stayed in the bag.

While flipping through my (admittedly cruddy) drawings last night, I came across this, and it made me insanely happy—not because it’s great, but because I can remember exactly how I felt when I drew a flippy collar that actually looked sort of like a flippy collar.

Al

Because this made me happy, I now have plans to get a 2011 sketch pad and challenge myself to draw something every day. You should, too. Also, we really should bake more stuff, don’t you think? Let’s do. ‘ ‘ ‘text/javascript’>

16 thoughts on “If it fails, I’ll name the baby Adiana.”

  1. Bake MORE? No! I have made 4 batches of cake balls in the last 7 weeks and if we bake MORE I may approach a 1:1 cake ball batch to week ratio and that would signal all kinds of bad things to come.

    But bad art? I can work on that, as long as the every day thing is negotiable…

  2. I have sketch pads. They contain one or two pastel paintings and then they get shoved away on a bookshelf or something. I have some artistic talent, just not enough to make me want to keep up with a sketch pad.

    I am interested to know how that permanent birth control works out. Also, still no power.

  3. I’m in! I uncoverd a sketch pad while decluttering my bedroom this weekend. I also baked chocolate chip cookies from scratch.

    I’m all set – let’s do this!

  4. Ruh-roh – I’m still using a messenger bag as a purse. And wearing opaque tights! Am I stuck in the 90s?!?!

  5. I totally did that last year, with the sketch pad and the promising to draw every day thing! It lasted … about three days. My inner critic made me cry and I decided drinking tequila was more fun.

    I have no advice on the other thingie; DH took care of that whole deal on our end (ha! a pun! kind of!). A bag of frozen peas was involved at some point in the recovery process, but I’m thinking that may not work for you.

  6. Love the idea of permanent birth control, but I don’t think anything could convince we to undergo a hysterosalpingogram (AKA Yeeeee-OUCH!), not even the promise of no more babies. I think I’d rather have hubby get snipped.

  7. I used to draw stick-figure comic strips instead of journaling. That was fun.

    Good luck with your fallopian rice. Seems kind of convoluted to me, since tubal ligation is outpatient surgery now. Still, I hope it works and all!

  8. My size (xyz) shorts from last summer are openly weeping that they may soon be replaced by size (xxyyzz), so I have been trying to avoid the baking habit – which is NOT easy for me to do, because…..I (heart) baking!! (And also…..eating!!!) But then, there are lots of hours of daylight to burn with my little people this summer….so I will likely be baking more than I’d hoped. Perhaps I *should* take up sketching….hmmn.

  9. When I started making noise about a third baby my husband got me a puppy, too. Three years later, we had a baby. Five and a half years after that, we had ANOTHER baby.

    Adiana is probably a smart move.

  10. I wouldn’t worry a bit about the hysterosalpingogram, it’s only temporary after all. :) After 11 yrs. of premature menopause, I don’t think the maternal longings will ever leave me, so I remain content.

    If Albert Einstein and Rocky Dennis had a baby, I would invision it looking very similar to your drawing. (I mean this in a good way)

  11. Hey, I had something similar to your Adiana, but called Essure. 8 years later and no problems to report. No babies, either. People asked, why me and not my husband? I replied, he’s not the one who gets pregnant. Control freak? Moi?

  12. Every time I think about asking my gynecologist about an IUD, I hear about them becoming dislodged and ending up somewhere they shouldn’t be. I am intrigued by Adiana, though. (I have no kids, although my gynecologist told me last year that they are working on an IUD specifically for women who have never had children.)

  13. So I see that my suggestion of getting pregnant as a solution to tackling the clutter is being rejected whole-heartedly. MORE CAKE BALLS! :)

  14. Yesterday afternoon, as I had the day off for various dr’s appt’s, my second daughter decided we had to make a cake. My eldest was at her last day of school for the year (hurray) so I thought, why not! I asked Nadine what flavour and she said “a candy cake”. I didn’t know what kind that was, so we just made an eggless (because I ran out of eggs) chocolate cake and threw every kind of chipit and candy bit that we had in the pantry on the top of it (it ended up with butterscotch and chocolate chips and lots of skor bits)( I hid the other varieties of candy from her because I didn’t think candy necklaces would taste very wonderful in a cake). All that said, the cake is yummy. I’m in for baking more–somehow it just makes me feel good….

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