I think I’ll just stick with Waffle Pit Party. (With emphasis on Pit and not Pity!)

I’m just going to say it. If Madonna ever calls and wants to grab burritos with me, I will turn down the offer. I probably won’t say this to her face, but I really don’t think we’re compatible. And that’s okay. She’s MADONNA, which means she probably has a lot of friends (both genuine and not so much). I don’t have a lot of friends, but I really like the ones I have, and there’s no room for Madonna in my Hyundai. (I also don’t have room for Mariah Carey, Ashley Judd, or Elisabeth Hasselbeck. In fact, it just took me nearly 20 minutes to care enough about the correct spelling of Elisabeth Hasselbeck’s name to return to this paragraph and change my original Elizabeth Hasselback.)

On the seventh day of spring break, I put green food coloring into my cashew milk/ banana/ almond butter smoothie. We then met a friend for Mediterranean lunch (falafel salad for me!), we went to the oil change dump for an oil/brake light/wiper hat trick, we grocery shopped for beefless beef and liquid aminos (because we are chemists), and now we’re doing laundry. In approximately three hours, I’ll be eating sushi and then knitting for a bit. Also, I need to search out something that will make my mind sharper, and that is such a long story and it probably wouldn’t interest you at all, so I’ll leave it at that.

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This photo was taken 22 years ago, on the day I graduated from college. I told the dean’s assistant to announce me as Angela Farquhar, and when he did, I laughed and laughed but then found out that it sort of confused (and probably angered) my parents and grandparents and the confusion (and potential anger) sort of outweighed the humor which perfectly explains my incompatibility with Madonna.

At 3:23 in the morning, I typed the following note into my phone:
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The Trazodone is no longer working, so I believe it’s time to embrace the idea of second sleep. Because life is what you make it, I think I’ll seek out similarly deprived neighbors for semi-regular three in the morning fire pit/harmonica/waffle hootenannies. Babies are welcome. (I’m still a little iffy on the harmonicas. Can it still be called a hootenanny if there is no folk music?) ‘ ‘ ‘text/javascript’>

9 thoughts on “I think I’ll just stick with Waffle Pit Party. (With emphasis on Pit and not Pity!)”

  1. I have been touting the line for awhile that – if I could schedule my life accordingly – I would sleep from 9pm to 3am, and then again from about 8am to 10am. I do try to do that some days, take an extended nap (or second sleep) late morning and on those days I always feel much more at peace with the world. So if you find a wake to make it work? Let me know. I’m always up for a 3am hootenanny.

  2. I WAS UP ALL NIGHT LAST NIGHT!!! We could have met up for waffles or doughnuts or something. I finally fell asleep around 5:30 this morning. I won’t be tired until tomorrow. It’s always the day after the day after, when I am most tired. I had to read about second sleep, I do that often. I seem to get my best sleep from 4:00 am- 8:00 am. I feel for you.

    Madonna is overrated.

  3. My daughter wanted to be Madonna when my daughter was 12 and Madonna was at the height of her popularity. I am so not compatible with Madonna after a couple of years of that.

    I had a falafel sandwich to celebrate St. Patrick’s Day. It was good.

    Try crossword puzzles to make your brain work.

    And tell your mom AGAIN that you’re sorry about that Farquhar business. She’s probably okay about it now but it can’t hurt to let her know you get it. You’re going to want her on your side when your girls decide to be funny.

  4. I sometimes do an inadvertent second sleep, when I fall asleep on the sofa at 9:30P, sleep for three hours, then wake up and putter around the house for an hour or more while my body figures out why I’m up but it’s still dark out.

    On the day after, I usually have to take a nap once the kids are on the bus which is, I guess, third sleep? I’d likely do better if I just forced myself to shut it all down at 11P.

  5. So much of the modern work- and schooldays are incompatible with the actual science behind optimal sleep and brains (BRAINSSSSS) and suchlike it’s a wonder anyone gets anything done.

    I would love second sleep. And I’ll suggest puffy white cloud emblems on all our hyundais in support.

    p.s., it’d be great if you put in a word with the babies of the world to come borned (!) knowing how to sleep that might make our movement more likely to succeed

  6. The fact that ‘beefless beef’ exists makes me want to crawl into a corner and weep openly until I’m dead.

    I’ve recently been waking up at 2:30 A.M. for no apparent reason. If you decide to move said hootenanny online, let me know.

  7. Ferguson—- latest attack on white man riding the train by blacks
    contrast w/ performance by beautiful Esperanza Spaulding (youtube)

    It really is all about “character” not the other “c ” word “color”………..

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