The record shows I took the blows and did it my way.

A few years ago, a friend of mine created an amazing piece of art with vegetables. She posted a photo to Facebook and one of the first comments was, “You have too much time on your hands.” I exploded with anger. (I’m only slightly exaggerating.) We all have the same amount of time. (Give or take, but you know what I’m saying.) Some people use it to check their phones. Some people use it to make vegetable art. Admittedly, I didn’t use much of my time in November to deal with NaBloPoMo. Nevertheless, here we are, and so we go.

Tomorrow is a bit of a monumental day for me. (Feel free to start organizing a marching band for a morning parade. I’ll be home until 750.) One of my very favorite people and I found ourselves eating quiche (crustless!) a few weeks back and we threw around sentences like, “I’m sick of not doing yoga and then feeling guilty so I park in front of the pantry and punish myself with Oreos” and “I need to be creating more things and worrying less about what people think of my creations” and “I must not be happy in ways that I don’t even understand because I spend my days moping around and I have no idea why.”

I could go on and on. (Truthfully, I brought up Oreos more than once.) If I *did* go on and on, I’m afraid I would bore you. (Why am I so worried about boring you?! Oreos? May I have some?)

Tomorrow. December 1, 2016.
I’m going to:
… redo Yoga Camp because I love it and it makes me happy.
… work on changing some unhealthy habits because I’m tired of feeling guilty.
… try to get a grip on the weirdo things that give me anxiety.
… forgive myself for screwing up, because I screw up all of the time.
… write. Hopefully, every day. Here sometimes. Other places more times.
… get a B12 shot so I have enough energy to do all of these things.

If there is anything you need to work on, feel free to join me tomorrow. New Year’s Resolutions are for assholes. (LOOK AT ME! I’M FINDING MY AUTHENTIC VOICE! I’m going to: … find my authentic voice!) ((New Year’s Resolutions aren’t really for assholes. I just wanted to sound tough and use more ellipses.))

I hope you’re ready for December. I’m never ready for anything, but I need to take better care of myself so I can take better care of anyone who needs it.


All of that, plus even MORE good sentences in my ears. There’s nothing I love more than good sentences in my ears.

Thank you for tagging along during NaBloPoMo! ‘ ‘ ‘text/javascript’>

13 thoughts on “The record shows I took the blows and did it my way.”

  1. “Walk”

    I shall take that as the imperative it ought to be, and I shall bring you along with me (in my mind) when I act on that good intention.

    Thanks for another great November, Angie. And here’s hoping that the coming December will be all things magical for you and your family!


  2. All good things, but my favorite is you finding your authentic voice — it’s much closer to my own than you usually put out there.

    I have one little suggestion for you: You said, “try to get a grip on the weirdo things that give me anxiety,” but you should just try to get a grip on ONE of those things. Take all the time you need. When you’ve actually conquered that one, then pick another. Biting off more than you can chew usually leads to choking.

    Enjoy December. It is whatever it’s going to be, whether you fret about it or not. Make it a point to relax some of your previous standards for what you demand of yourself. Everyone who knows you will be happier that you’re happy than they would be with more/better decorations or whatever it is you feel you are remiss with.

    And thanks for November. It was a tough month for me (for some of the reasons the whole country had a tough time, plus a few personal things just to kick it up a notch) but I smiled often when I got the chance to drop by and see what you’d written. Now, go play.

  3. Thank you for writing so much it’s a refreshing pace to come & visit at a time of such dilemma. I’ll see you over at Adrienne’s for yoga play, she’s great. I’m just having trouble getting out of bed as I know it’s cold out there.

    Many, many thanks for the nice comments about my art work. I think your knitting is incredible. The colours and stitches blow me away. I cannot knit! Go craft & have fun. Xxx

    P.s. This the season for brandy snaps and gingerbread!

  4. I’ve also think that January is a terrible time for resolutions, because who feels like making a major life change when it’s dark and cold all the time? I too had resolved to start working on some pre-resolutions in December to see how they felt. I’m pregnant, so it’s hard to plan too far ahead, so I’m mostly just going for as much radical self-care as possible.

  5. That Jane Kenyon quote slapped me across the face and then punched me in the gut. I want those things and God knows I need to dump some bad habits and some creeping anxiety and and and….

    Instead of doing any of those things above, I’m starting my December with travel to San Francisco for a smarty pants conference that I don’t feel smart enough to attend.

    I’m not a resolution person, but just because of time and what not, January is just going to have to be my month to be kinder to myself.

  6. Remember the Desiderata? Yeah – that’s one I need to re-read.

    Thanks for stringing some lights around November! It’s been fun checking in with you.

    Best wishes to all the Puddings for a lovely holiday!

  7. Ever since I first read your post, I’ve been re-reading and selecting “mark as unread” in the RSS feed so that I keep seeing it over and over again. So many good things to keep in mind as I attempt to face December less full of dread than usual.

  8. Thanks for the idea to start Adriene’s Yoga Camp today. I just did Day 1 and look forward to 29 more days of her super-mellow brand of adorable.

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